This is what I wrote last year, stands true today–
I grew up a calloused Christian. It was my defense and way to survive. I’m not alone in this so maybe you will relate. The problem with being calloused and not letting yourself feel is that you have no idea that other people DO feel.
That you can actually hurt someone, even God, possibly even break a heart or two or three…I remember well the first time I had an overwhelming sense of sorrow and brokenness to the point of utter despair. I had done something unforgivable, against someone that could have completely severed that relationship and yet they forgave me and were willing to work through the painful yet rewarding healing process with me. I remember clearly thinking, I’ve just seen an illustration of Christ’s love for me through this human. Nobody had ever loved me like that before and I didn’t feel worthy. Yet I had to accept it because it was being given to me freely even though they were hurting equally.
I never wanted to experience that again and I have been a changed person ever since. Not perfect but with a new attitude toward sin. Sin was a useful and necessary experience to break my heart and it has caused me to look at other people and their “sins” differently. Though what they’re doing is wrong it just may be the catalyst toward a broken heart and a new relationship with God (and you) and if you are on the receiving end of their sin, maybe this is your opportunity to be like CHRIST to them, forgive them unconditionally and be willing to work through the problem and pain with them. Yes, you too will have to feel during the process and sometimes that means hurting. But the outcome is worth it, that’s why Jesus was willing to feel the pain of a broken heart at the cross for each one of us. No pain, no gain.